Punny Fun With Funny Puns

Some of my little stories, for all the silly little folk out there to enjoy. They're like hors d'oeuvres, aren't they, tiny delicacies. One bite each, and you can never get enough. ...Who am I kidding?

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Location: Canada

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

The Little Star's Big Adventure

A children's story in space

Once upon a time there was a tiny little star. All it wanted to do was to grow up into a red giant, but it knew that it would be a long time until that happened. Until then, it wanted to take care of its little universe as well as it possibly could.

The little star often spoke to its planets and their moons to make sure that everything was alright. If ever there was a problem, the star would do everything in its might to make it right again. The planets liked the little star very much - it was gentle and considerate, and always remembered their birthdays - but the little star couldn't help but wish for adventure. And one day, it came.

Now two different kinds of aliens lived on the little star's planets. One was called the Gloogloos and the other were the Neeglars, and they were both peaceful peoples. But in the neighbouring galaxy lived the vicious Z'Art'Oks, who liked nothing better than destroying peaceful alien races and humiliating little stars. The Z'Art'Oks flew their destroyer ships above the planets of the Gloogoos and the Neeglars and they told them bad jokes and made all their food taste like eggplant and dog biscuits. The Gloogoos cooed sadly and the Neeglars keened, but the Z'Art'Oks only laughed at them and made them listen to Phil Collins.

The little star saw all this happening and it got very upset. The poor Gloogoos! The unhappy Neeglars! Clearly something had to be done.

First the little star tried talking to the Z'Art'Oks sternly and asking them to leave, but they dyed all the grass purple and the trees pink.

Then the star tried bribing the Z'Art'Oks, telling them that they would have lots of candy if only they would return home, but the Z'Art'Oks pulled out a giant cotton candy machine from one of their destroyer ships and made cotton candy and put it on their heads like hair.

Finally the little star told the Z'Art'Oks that if they didn't leave, it would burn all their ships. At first, the Z'Art'Oks didn't believe the little star. But it huffed and puffed and blew a great big fireball into space, and then the Z'Art'Oks knew that the star really would destroy their ships. So they all got back in their ships - after turning the food and the music and the grass and the trees back to normal - and they flew away.

After the Z'Art'Oks had gone, the Gloogloos and the Neeglars rejoiced, and thanked the little star profusely. The little star was very flattered by all the attention, and blushed so hard...

...that it turned into a red giant!

And the Z'Art'Oks never bothered that star again.

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